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Ghosts find us

I was thinking today of a place I have visited once a year for the past three years, even though I lived there a long while a long time ago.

Three years ago, I walked around, pausing often to figure out exactly where I was. Groves of trees: new. Coffee shop/bookstore: new. The entire interior of a key building: rearranged. New buildings. But not everything changes, not all at once, anyway. Once I had my new bearings, I was fine.

I stood on a now-shaded sidewalk and stared up about three stories’ worth at a smooth brick façade. What was smooth brick had once been lined by windows. I could see the long-ago windows. One of them was open. A dark angel leaned out and gave me a laughing welcome.

I shook my head back into the present tense.

One year later: same sidewalk, same stare, same smooth bricks. I took a quick sip from a cup of coffee from the new shop, and then walked away.

Two years later: Not even a walk-by. Not even a glance. Ghosts find us easily enough. There’s no need to seek them.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
vivitalia
Jul. 9th, 2012 02:08 am (UTC)
"I shook my head back into the present tense." Hit me like a brick to the ear. Flat. This entire piece is packed with beauty, but that line is one of those that couldn't be more appropriate. Well done.
patrick_vecchio
Jul. 9th, 2012 02:13 am (UTC)
Thank you. Whenever I get props from you, I feel like I've made the keystrokes count.
nodressrehersal
Jul. 9th, 2012 03:33 pm (UTC)
So poetic, this one.
patrick_vecchio
Jul. 9th, 2012 03:41 pm (UTC)
Thanks, Jamie. I'm trying to force myself to write every day for a post. You should see all the crap I'm deleting. Wait: no, you shouldn't see the crap I'm deleting, because it's crap.
nodressrehersal
Jul. 10th, 2012 11:25 pm (UTC)
Well, the stuff that's making it to lj is freakin' awesome.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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Wish I'd Said It

Nota bene: “Fear has governed my life, if I think about it. ... I always feel like I’m not good enough for some reason. I wish that wasn’t the case, but left to my own devices, that voice starts speaking up.” – Trent Reznor

“I hate to say this, but not many people care what you do. They care about what you do as much as you care about what they do. Think about it. Just exactly that much. You are not the center of the universe.” — Laurie Anderson

"The path's not yours till you've gone it alone a time." – William Carlos Williams

“Filling this empty space constitutes my identity.” – Twyla Tharp

"My definition of peace is having no noise in my head." – Eric Clapton

"The wreckage of the sky serves to confirm us in delicious error." – John Ashbery

"We are all here by the grace of the big bang. We are all literally the stuff of the stars." – Dwight Owsley

"For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of stars makes me dream." – Vincent van Gogh

"It is only with the heart that one can see right; what is essential is invisible to the eye." — Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"Forget about being a perfectionist, because entropy always wins out in the end." – Darren Kaufman.

"Impermanence. Impermanence. Impermanence." – Garry Shandling

"Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion." – Mark Twain

"There is no realm wherein we have the truth." – Gordon Lish

"Actual life is full of false clues and sign-posts that lead nowhere." – E.M. Forster

“Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe." – Frank Zappa

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