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Fair warning

I ordered a small black-and-white printer to use in my home office, and it arrived today.

I took it into the office, unloaded it from the box, and then did the typical Guy Thing: hooked it up without reading the instructions. No problem—probably because I have the same printer in my office at work.

After I finished, I spotted a small white packet with writing on it. The packet rattled when I shook it, so I decided it must be something good to eat. (The way I see it, after I've unpacked something, anything left that isn't plastic or Styrofoam is edible.) I ripped open the packet and started chowing down.

It wasn't until I ate half the packet's contents that I looked at the printing on the packet:

Desiccant Silica Gel Do Not Eat Throw Away

The way I figure it, the phrase "Do Not Eat" only appears five times on the packet, so I wasn't given fair warning. Surely a jury will see it my way and agree on a fat settlement.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
tanadariel
Mar. 8th, 2012 12:05 am (UTC)
A jury would probably go your way. I say this because my hairdryer has a sticker on it that advises me not to remove the sticker, ever, because its purpose is to remind me not to use the hairdryer while in the bathtub.
cwmackowski
Mar. 8th, 2012 05:31 am (UTC)
So now you have implants. Big deal. I'll just start calling you "Size D."
nodressrehersal
Mar. 8th, 2012 05:07 pm (UTC)
Now you know what premenstrual bloat feels like.
anita_margarita
Mar. 8th, 2012 07:26 pm (UTC)
You made this up. Please tell me you made this up.
patrick_vecchio
Mar. 11th, 2012 11:06 pm (UTC)
You're right: I didn't eat that stuff.

I ground it up and snorted it.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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“Filling this empty space constitutes my identity.” – Twyla Tharp

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"Actual life is full of false clues and sign-posts that lead nowhere." – E.M. Forster

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