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Wish I'd said it

"Laughter is carbonated holiness." — Annie Lamont, quoted in the May/June issue of Writer's Digest, which I thought would be a good idea to subscribe to, but the fact that I'm just now getting to the May/June issue tells you what kind of an idea that turned out to be—or maybe that's being a bit unfair because maybe the writers who subscribe to Writer's Digest are different kinds of writers than I am, real writers, or wanna-be real writers, whereas I am an ink-stained wretch from the world of newspapers, summary lead, inverted pyramid, watch those adjectives and adverbs, kiddo, this ain't Writing with a capital W—it's a sentence assembly line, a paragraph factory, not creative writing—and really, it hasn't been that long since I stated on this blog that I've lost my writing mojo, as this stinking heap of vowels and consonants attests. So I'll serve that quotation up again:

"Laughter is carbonated holiness." — Annie Lamont.

Comments

( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
tanadariel
Dec. 2nd, 2010 02:14 am (UTC)

I find it interesting how, every time you say you've lost your mojo, your writing just keeps getting better. So keep it up, I suppose. I look forward to all your posts.

cwmackowski
Dec. 2nd, 2010 02:48 am (UTC)
I know!
vivitalia
Dec. 2nd, 2010 02:18 pm (UTC)
what she said.
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:21 am (UTC)
Thanks, Lizz.
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:10 am (UTC)
Hey, did that guitar player get in touch with you yet?
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:09 am (UTC)
Thank you, Danielle.
cwmackowski
Dec. 2nd, 2010 02:47 am (UTC)
Kathy just ordered us subscriptions to WD and Poets & Writers, so we should be getting them at the office soon.

Great Lamont quote.
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:12 am (UTC)
Damn! She told me we were going to subcribe to Punctuation Illustrated and Dangling Participles for Men.
nodressrehersal
Dec. 2nd, 2010 03:40 am (UTC)
....as this stinking heap of vowels and consonants attests...

*Sniff* I don't smell nothin' stinky. It takes some kinda mojo to write that paragraph-long sentence the way you did, all properly punctuated and perfectly readable and crystal clear to boot.
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:12 am (UTC)
Thanks, Jamie. What's the weather like in your neighborhood?
nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:25 am (UTC)
We have maybe two, three inches at best... but we were supposed to work with a client in Alden today, and she cancelled on our behalf - two feet and counting. Tomorrow we're supposed to be in Lancaster, which is apparently in a state of emergency. My folks, ten minutes away, have more than a foot... crazy, crazy stuff. The thruway right where Dick gets off for work was closed.

How about you guys?
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:43 am (UTC)
The problem here is water. On my drive home tonight, East State Street was closed at the tile plant; apparently, the water is over the road beyond that. If that's happened since we moved out here, I don't remember. The river is at its 10th-highest level ever, but I haven't been down to the dikes or anywhere near the river for some firsthand reporting.

I'm headed to Rochester tomorrow afternoon to have some service done on Sherry's car, but I think that trip will be well east of all the lake-effect snow.
nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:46 am (UTC)
Scott just texted me from Ithaca, and they have no snow - he said it was an uneventful trip, weather-wise, so hopefully your trip to Rochester will be similar.

Dick wants to know if Duke Miller can pick you guys up in his old ambulance and take a drive down to view the river, or head over to Warner's for a pie while the rest of the city is sandbagging...
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 01:59 am (UTC)
Tell Dick I was down at the river today and the 56-inch muskellunge from Warner's Pizza went floating by, along with some tumbleweed, a day-old maple-iced doughnut, and a tray with the Beatles' on it.

"Oh, we got it. From a guy."

nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:08 am (UTC)
Even I know the next line... "Stucco planters, pillars and posts"

Dick just broke out in song: When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's Pops Warner
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:10 am (UTC)
Dick's memory is failing him. The lyric ends "... that's Pat Faulkner."
nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:11 am (UTC)
He's laughing too hard to tell me who that is...
nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:12 am (UTC)
Dick says you have to explain it to me in 20 words or less... and he's still laughing; so am I, and I have NO idea why!
patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:39 am (UTC)
Pat worked behind the counter in Warner's. Just picture Dick, me and Rosie singing that line, repeatedly, with increasing volume each time, inside Warner's Bakery at 2:30 in the morning. That says it all.

Sorry: I just couldn't do it in 20 words.

Maybe someday I'll write a book about the Bowery. Dick's "Mick Jagger in the fog" episode would be among the highlights.
nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:43 am (UTC)
He says it was foggy in more ways than one...

patrick_vecchio
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:49 am (UTC)
Ask him if he was there for Hank Stebick's "A little desert, boys?" episode.
nodressrehersal
Dec. 3rd, 2010 02:53 am (UTC)
No recollection of that, he says.
( 22 comments — Leave a comment )

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Wish I'd Said It

Nota bene: “Fear has governed my life, if I think about it. ... I always feel like I’m not good enough for some reason. I wish that wasn’t the case, but left to my own devices, that voice starts speaking up.” – Trent Reznor

“I hate to say this, but not many people care what you do. They care about what you do as much as you care about what they do. Think about it. Just exactly that much. You are not the center of the universe.” — Laurie Anderson

"The path's not yours till you've gone it alone a time." – William Carlos Williams

“Filling this empty space constitutes my identity.” – Twyla Tharp

"My definition of peace is having no noise in my head." – Eric Clapton

"The wreckage of the sky serves to confirm us in delicious error." – John Ashbery

"We are all here by the grace of the big bang. We are all literally the stuff of the stars." – Dwight Owsley

"For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of stars makes me dream." – Vincent van Gogh

"It is only with the heart that one can see right; what is essential is invisible to the eye." — Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"Forget about being a perfectionist, because entropy always wins out in the end." – Darren Kaufman.

"Impermanence. Impermanence. Impermanence." – Garry Shandling

"Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion." – Mark Twain

"There is no realm wherein we have the truth." – Gordon Lish

"Actual life is full of false clues and sign-posts that lead nowhere." – E.M. Forster

“Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe." – Frank Zappa

“I try to leave out the parts that readers tend to skip.” – Elmore Leonard

“The secret of being a bore is to tell everything.” – Voltaire

• Journal title and subtitle: Ian Hunter, “Man Overboard”

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